silent number : the boss of 'Czechoslovakia'

Geez, trying to make my way to cz with the dog...
it seems another thing that I thought was kind of problematic a year ago seems relatively problem free in retrospect.
so I go to buy a ticket.
they tell me I have to physically bring in the ticket I bought last trip i used with aerosvit to get those airmile points.
i bring it in.
they say you dont need it but anyway I cant use any of the airmile points.
the price is in dollars, so almost double the price it was last year.
I go with it.
This part is frustrating but predictable. Considering this is the national airline of Ukraine, not THE Ukraine, and the office has maps, computer terminals and phones, I assume some knowledge of history of the region, and knowhow regarding use of the equipment on the desk.
well, you know about assumption..

They tell me the flights they had advertised were one way with their partner csa, one way with aerosvit, and that from prague to kyiv they can say the dog will not be a problem, but to get there the flight is with their partner csa so they cant guarantee I can take the dog.
I say, "can we call csa to check?"
they say " no"
I say "do you have the number so can call them?"
they say "no"
I say "do you have a phone book so I can find the number and call them, they have an office in kyiv"
they say "no phone books"
I say "do you have the internet so we can find the number and call them?"
they say " We cant look for any numbers. We cant call Czechoslovakia. It is 6 pm. It is closed"
I say " I think Czechoslovakia 'closed' a bit before 6, but does the czech airline NOT have a telephone"
they say " you can go to prague and ask if they do"
I say " but the office is here in kyiv, cant we call that office?"
They say " no. only the country will know, not the airline"
I say " but I have done this a few times over the past 3 years, through your office, without a problem, by someone using the phone to call your partner company"
they say " I dont know if you did or you didnt. Go to Czechoslovakia and ask"
OH yeah??? Yeah, well I WILL!

Johnny and I will not be defeated by a ten-set of gel nails and the " permanent coffee break" attitude.
I am gonna find that boss of Czechoslovakia and me and him or her are gonna head down to Aerosvit head office and hot glue gun a phone book so a certain you-know-who's forehead.

And then request, sternly even, the vegetarian snack and aisle seat.